Wednesday, October 29, 2008
My best friend in the world, is obviously, my husband. People who know us, know that fact. We are goofy, we love each other more than anyone in the world and we are the only ones who get each other. :) It is such a blessing to be married to my best friend.
Like any relationship, obviously, marriage takes work and more than anything, God's grace. :)
I think that in my life there has only been one other person, other than Nick, that comes close to knowing my heart, my weaknesses, my strengths, my heart's desires, and my fears. She doesn't judge me, nor does she expect things of me that are not expectations God has for me. She lets me be me. Always. It is funny that we are closer now than when she lived in the states. :) There will be a month or so pass and we won't communicate, but the second one of us emails, it is at the right time we need it, the right words, or whatever, from the Lord. When she lived here, where her cell phone worked, we could text at any time of day or night for prayer or support. I miss that, now that she is in a country where her service is not reliable, I don't have that privilege to bother her at 2 am nor does she have that convenience to call for help at any time of day or night. It is something I took for granted. I took for granted the fact that the closest friend besides my husband, was at my fingertips for years, and in the last 10 months I have wanted her close.
The point I want to get across is that, there were times in my life that I would run to her before I would run to Jesus. There are times today, that I run to my husband and best friend, Nick, before I run to Jesus, my ultimate best friend. I wonder, a lot, if Jesus sits and just waits for me to choose him first. He has the answer, the time, the wisdom, the knowledge, the peace, the comfort, the closeness, the shoulder, the everything I need. I don't run to him. I run to Nick, I run to Gina, I run to other friends, to my mom or dad, or to myself.
I have noticed in the last 10 months I have had some amazing friends come and go in and out of my life. There were friends that I held too close, and did not cling to Jesus instead. God awoke me to that and I am now aware of the pure and desperate need I have for my Jesus. (key word: my)
We talk about Jesus, like he is a stranger or someone we can't reach. He is mine. He is yours. Not in a selfish sense, but in a desperate sense. Without our Jesus, we are nothing. Does that pierce you at all? Does it awaken your soul and mind to a realization? To admit, realize, and then relish in the fact that we are desperate for Jesus, is truly life changing.
Gina's pastor spoke of passion last night at college group. He defines the word, passion, I believe. The Spirit follows that man wherever he goes. No, he is not a perfect man, but he is desperately relying and loving Jesus. With all he is, he is following his Master. His desire is to see his friends, his family, his small poverish community in southern Costa Rica, and the world, even Amarillo, a city he has just met, to meet His Jesus. What a beautiful person.
I suppose this has gone on longer than I had planned, but I will wrap it up in this:
keep your best friends close, but not above your Jesus.
have passion for your Jesus.