Tuesday, June 7, 2011

bed rest day ??

haha. so I have been put on continued rest probably until Ava gets here. Parts of me, like my feet, legs, knees, abdomen, hands, fingers, head, and stamina are glad about it. My always active and going and doing something mind, heart and will are struggling. I get emotional being alone all day at home while Nick is out working his butt off for our well being. I get to where I want to do something around the house and I get part of it done and then get so tired, so I stop and rest for awhile. I know people are telling me to soak up the rest, the quiet, the being waited on hand and foot, etc. and I am in my own way, but I am desiring to be back to my "normal" self in many ways. I would love to lose all of the fluid retention, I desperately desire to meet my sweet baby, I am tired of pregnancy hormones, I want to be able to tie my shoes, ok WEAR my shoes. haha.
I am thankful for this time of being quiet, of being surrendered completely and still learning to be even more surrendered to Him. I am thankful for the rest. Don't get me wrong. I will desire rest again soon I know. I also know that being home with Ava I will have the opportunities some don't, to rest in the day with her, to soak up as much time with her as she grows and develops than some people because of the sacrifices we are about to make financially. Nick is so amazing to want this as well and work for it.
So this evening I am trying to do some small chores so that when people come visit, the house won't look too horrible. :) haha. I do have visitors coming tomorrow and thursday so that will be nice. Sweet friends and family.

I just can't thank nick enough for all he does, for all he is doing and what he is becoming for our family. I pray that I am becoming the wife, mother and woman that God wants me to be during this time of transition, emotionally, physically, spiritually, etc. I feel like we joined hands and jumped off the cliff into parenthood, stay at home mommy-hood, 2 jobs to provide-hood etc and nick's face is like WEEEEEE and mine is like HOLY CRAP!!! haha. :) He is so patient and quietly full faith and strength. I am weak and a cry baby! We fit well together, God knows that full well. :)

guess that is all for now.

Monday, June 6, 2011

You Are Good- Nichole Nordeman

When the sun starts to rise
And I open my eyes
You are good, so good
In the heat of the day
With each stone that I lay
You are good, so good

With ever breath I take in
I'll tell you I'm grateful again
When the moon climbs high
Before each kiss goodnight
You are good

When the road starts to turn
Around each bend I've learned
You are good so good
And when somebody's hand
Holds me up helps me stand
You are so good

With every breath I take in
I'll tell You I'm grateful again
'Cause its more than enough
Just to know I am loved
And You are good

So how can I thank You
What can I bring
What can these poor hands
Lay at the feet of a King
I'll sing You a love song
It's all that I have
To tell You I'm grateful
For holding my life in Your Hands

When it's dark and it's cold
And I can't feel my soul
You are so good
When the world is gone gray
And the rain's here to stay
You are still good

So with every breath I take in
I'll tell You I am grateful again
And the storm my swell
Even then it's well and You are good

Friday, June 3, 2011

bed rest day 2

well, we're on day 2 of bed rest. I guess things have gone well so far. I have a terrible cough with a lot of drainage. It is drying out my throat and making it real sore, so that is very frustrating. I'm praying that it is not a cold or anything too serious, that way I won't have to be on any medications. I am figuring out that I am quite swollen all over. I didn't realize it until I stopped and now I see I am swollen all over. I also didn't realize just how much pain I have been in until I stopped long enough to notice. So, overall I'm praying for some peace, healthy blood pressure, blood/urine tests, etc to be found out on monday. then for ava to be ok and keep growing.
suppose that is all for now...

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

bed rest...

so I didn't think I would have to get to this point in our pregnancy. Things have been so smooth and great the whole time. But, here we are. Until monday, I will be resting at home. This seems like a great little vacation but it isn't. I feel rather useless and I am struggling with feeling like I'm letting everyone down. I know the enemy is just trying to keep me anxious, stressed and frustrated, so I am looking at bed rest, as a time of surrender, quietness, and a time to listen and prepare for this huge life change coming. I am always going a million miles a day and so God is forcing me to stop, slow down, be quiet, still and listen to him. Pray I surrender and really listen to him during this weekend. I pray I can sleep, read, pray, work on some stuff for design and mary kay (while on the couch) and also make flower balls for Robbie's wedding! (while on the couch) :) no worries, I won't be up and about. prayers are appreciated. I'm sure I will blog again sometime this weekend.